I Work Just as Hard as Scarlett, Whines Job-Needing Lindsay

Lindsay Lohan is supposedly still on the wagon, but that hasn't stopped her from uncorking a mighty fine whine.
"You know what's hard?" the underemployed, drama-addicted starlet, 22, bellyaches in the February issue of Interview (the chat was conducted by Lauren Hutton). "I want to give back. I want to do all the things that will make me feel fulfilled. But whenever I do those things, people think it's a press stunt or something."
Lohan, who reportedly rang in the new year by publicly brawling with squeeze Samantha Ronson, blames the paparazzi for making her life difficult, insisting that "there's really no way of hiding from that," even though actual do-gooders such as Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are able to disappear -- with six kids in tow -- for extended periods of time.
When Hutton suggests that she go somewhere "where no one knows you," Lindsay sighs that "it's so impossible for me to actually do that," citing as evidence her November trip to Dubai for a swanky hotel opening, a star-packed soiree that drew everyone from Mary-Kate Olsen to Robert De Niro, not exactly the place to get away from it all.
"But the second that you complain about it, they say, 'Well, this is what you wanted, so this is what you're going to get.' That's all people see it as now. It's not, 'No, I just want to have some time for myself,'" she grouses, seemingly oblivious to her complete inability to stay away from the spotlight and enjoy a quiet night at home with a cup of cocoa and a good book. "There are things I want to do, and people don't understand that. You know, my car accident that I got into where I got my first charge, I wouldn't have been speeding up like I was if I didn't have people shoving cameras in my windows."
Lindsay appears to be referring to her May 2007 arrest for DUI after she curbed her Mercedes ("my favorite car," she points out, "which I worked my ass off to buy for myself") in Beverly Hills after a night on the town. Soon after, she entered rehab for the second of three times that year.

Lindsay gets her groove on at a London club last November. (©Retna Ltd.)
"I have become this girl who just loves to be photographed, doesn't know how to focus, doesn't know how to work on set, just loves the attention, knows how to go out at night, knows how to party," she fumes. "And you know what? I was 20 years old. I never went to college. I lived maybe six months out of my life like that, doing something wrong, and then I stopped. God forbid I should have ever learned my lesson. But at this point it's so hard for people to even believe that there was a lesson to be learned at all, because they just think I'm wrong."
And while some might question Lohan's math on that six-months-of-her-life figure (apropos of nothing, she was accused of bad behavior in October while guest-starring on "Ugly Betty," with her planned six episodes getting cut to four), she sighs that she can't shake her tabloid-stoked reputation.
"I just feel as though it's become a situation where people have manifested this caricature of who I am, and they act as if there's no real person inside of it," she gripes (although props for the five-dollar phrase "manifested this caricature"). "I mean, people really have come to believe -- directors, producers, agents, whoever it may be -- that I started in this because I wanted to be a celebrity. But that was never my intention."
What hurts the most, moans the actress, who has spent much of the last several months fighting with Ronson at hot spots around the globe and posting defensive messages on her MySpace page, "is that I work just as hard as any other actress around my age, like Scarlett Johansson, but I just don't get the opportunities that they get because people are so distracted by the mess that I created in my life. But that doesn't mean it's going to last forever."
(By the by, the reference to the Woody Allen-beloved starlet comes three years after Lohan reportedly scrawled a decidedly nasty dig at her in a bathroom stall at a New York bar. "I don't really know that person," Scarlett sniffed in the December issue of Allure. "I don't know what the motivation was.")
Lindsay also name-drops Heath Ledger in the chat, recalling some words of wisdom he gave her on fame: "He said, 'It's build you up to knock you down, and that's all it is. And you just have to see if you can stand through it.' And it is like that, if you put yourself in this situation. I was young, so maybe I did ... I always wanted to take the blame. I've always been apologetic for other people's faults."
She continues, "And I didn't even try everything. I was too afraid. The one thing I tried was the wrong thing. And maybe it was just because I'd seen someone else in my family do it -- not my mother. But, I don't know, it really ... It sucks."
Perhaps with all the free time she's had on her hands lately, Lohan should consider enrolling in a few film study classes, if only to mix with a more cinematically erudite crowd.

"I wanted to be a movie star. But movie stars are not what they used to be ... I don't think there are too many films coming out these days that we're going to look at in the future and say, 'This is one of the great ones,'" explains the star of such turkeys as "I Know Who Killed Me" and "Just My Luck." "Like, what is the great film that I will tell my children about? I'm still going to tell them about the old films, the Hitchcock films. And people my age don't even know who those people are. I can't even have a conversation with most people of my generation about that, because they'd be like, 'OK, she's a freak. Something's wrong with her.'"
Meanwhile, it seems Lohan was in no mood for a conversation -- about film or anything else -- when she hit Los Angeles hot spot Apple Lounge on Tuesday night with a girlfriend and an assistant but sans Ronson, says E! News.
"She seemed kind of indifferent, emotionless," recalls a spywitness. "It was definitely apparent her friends were trying to cheer her up. It looked to be a 'first night back out on the town' sort of thing."
Lindsay, who took to her blog on Monday to deny breakup reports, was spotted with Sam on Wednesday as they exited the DJ's house, but they ignored shutterbug-lobbed questions about the state of their relationship.
That same day, Lohan took a break from all her hard work to go on a paparazzi-documented shopping trip to Burberry and Barneys in Beverly Hills.

Lindsay Lohan Docs Out

Lindsay Lohan must be feeling a little run-down right about now.

The past couple of weeks have been hectic for the 22-year-old actress. She shuttled between Paris and London, accompanying her lady-love, 31-year-old DJ Samantha Ronson, on Ronson's European tour. (Sam performs at Crimson at Sax Hotel in Chicago tonight.)

She attended the opening of a luxury resort in Dubai, and possibly added to the volatility of the Middle Eastern region.

And, most distressingly, she was pelted with flour by an animal-rights fanatic while entering the VIP club in Paris.

Once back on American soil, LiLo made a beeline to the nearest medical professional.

Lohan was seen leaving a medical building in Beverly Hills yesterday, sparking speculation about the part-time actress's well-being.

Maybe Linds, who's been physically and professionally depleted of late, was getting a B-12 shot?

Or perhaps Lohan, who was spotted at a psychiatrist's office in Santa Monica earlier this month with Ronson, has decided that couples' therapy is best when augmented with individual treatment.

Either way, it's nice to see that Lindsay is seeking the cure for what ails her from licensed professionals, instead of a practitioner whose "office" consists of a beeper, a lightweight scale, and a box of plastic baggies.

Punchy Lohan Slams Palin as 'Narrow-Minded Homophobe'

Lindsay Lohan's online missives have come a long way from the days when she offered to "release a politically/morally correct, fully adequite [sic] letter to the press ... simply to state my oppinions [sic] on how our society should be educated on for the better of our country."
Now, with a little help from inamorata Samantha Ronson, she's penned a surprisingly coherent diatribe on Sen. John McCain's vice presidential running mate, Gov. Sarah Palin, which she says was sparked by her "fear, anxiety, concern, disappointment and stress" and her inability to "bite my tongue any more."
"Is it a sin to be gay? Should it be a sin to be straight? Or to use birth control? Or to have sex before marriage? Or even to have a child out of wedlock?" the Barack Obama-supporting actress, 22, rails on her MySpace page. "Is our country so divided that the Republicans' best hope is a narrow-minded, media-obsessed homophobe?"
She goes on to cite an Associated Press story about how Palin's longtime church in Wasilla, Alaska, promoted a conference "that promises to convert gays into heterosexuals through prayer."
And while Lohan says, "I am not against Sarah Palin as a mother or woman," she points out that "women have come a long way in the fight to have the choice over what we do with our bodies. ... And it's frightening to see that a woman in 2008 would negate all of that."
She adds that she "would have liked to have remained impartial; however, I am afraid that the 'lipstick on a pig' comments will overshadow the issues. ... I have faith that this country will be all that it can be with the proper guidance. I really hope that all of you make your decisions based on the facts and what feels right to you in your heart -- vote for Obama!"
Alas, LiLo then undoes much of her earlier eloquence by concluding, "Oh, and ... hint hint Pali-pal -- don't pose for anymore tabloid covers, you're not a celebrity, you're running for office to represent our, your, my COUNTRY! And in the words of Pamela Anderson, 'She can suck it.'"In between educating the public on policy issues and spreading Pam's deep thoughts on politics, Lindsay has been flashing a sizeable heart-shaped sparkler on her ring finger, which has led simmering betrothal rumors to heat back up.
But her rep insists that the diamond bauble isn't an engagement ring and wasn't given to her by Sam, whom she recently gushed to Marie Claire is a "great person."
"She bought it herself," the mouthpiece tells People. "It's an antique ring that she found at an antique store in NYC."
So, why show off an eye-catching rock that she knows will kick-start speculation about the seriousness of her relationship with Ronson, whom the New York Post says she enjoyed an extended and "intense liplock" session with during a recent night out at New York's Beatrice Inn?
"It's like her own personal joke these days," a snitch tattles to E! News. "She slips a ring on that finger, then goes to a party and watches the rumors start to roll. It amuses her."
Not amusing to Lindsay? Tripping in front of the paparazzi.
TMZ reports that Lohan stumbled over a barricade set up outside New York's Bowery Hotel on Sunday night for a birthday bash tossed by Jennifer Lopez for husband Marc Anthony.
Apparently concluding that a shutterbug was responsible for her lack of balance, LiLo "punched" one of them in the nose, all while talking on her phone and carrying a suitcase-sized purse.
After the supposed proboscis swing, she is said to have told the person on the phone, "Oh my God, I just hit a paparazzi."
Police were reportedly called but no charges filed.